I Couldn't Have Imagined This

There have been a lot of moments in my life that I feel have defined me. When I was baptized. When I first sang in front of an audience that consisted of more than old people at a retirement home. When I tried out for a play for the first time and got the lead role. When I finally let myself realize that I was in love with Derek. When I said yes. When I went through the temple for the first time. When I said yes, again, and became a wife.

All of those moments, along with many others, have shaped me into me. Then, this last February, finding out I was pregnant changed my opinion. I was going to have a baby, and I knew it was going to change my life. But I don't think I could have ever imagined this.

It's almost as if your heart grows an extra chamber, making room for all of the love that will fill you once you have your baby. It gets bigger every time they squeeze your finger. Each time they smile when they see your face. Each time they refuse to sleep until you hold them in your arms. Each time they poop so much that it goes up their back and you still think they're the cutest thing in the world, your love for them grows.

I've only had Reece for 33 days, but I already love her more than I thought I could.

I love my little family. Derek is the best husband and father. Seeing him with her is always my favorite part of the day. I look in Reece's eyes, and I see me. I feel like she is me. But she's not. She's a part of me, just as she is a part of Derek. But she's Reece.

She is the perfect, beautiful little baby that has become the most important defining moment of my life.