Mommy, Will You Please?

"Nana, just get out of the kitchen!" I groaned at the family dog. She couldn't help but follow her nose, which inevitably leads her into the kitchen where she is constantly underfoot. I was frantically trying to throw together the crust for some lemon bars, cook chicken for dinner, and talk Reece through the process of putting her shoes away:

1. Pick up the shoes.
2. Walk to the shoe basket (which was about 15 feet away).
3. Put the shoes in the basket.

Simple enough, and yet this resulted in a catastrophic amount of tears, Reece in a puddle on the floor, all while Marley was crying. I escorted Reece up to her bedroom and told her that she needed to lay on her bed until she could calm down. 

I went downstairs and sat down to nurse the baby. Halfway through feeding Marley I realized that I had forgotten to set the timer on the crust for the lemon bars. I hurriedly got up, guessed at how long the crust had been in the oven, and set a timer. 

At this point, I was completely flustered and frazzled. 

Marley finished eating and Reece came downstairs happy and ready to put her shoes away. Hooray! I went back into the kitchen to finish preparing dinner. I had to get everything cooked and prepared before 3:00pm because the missionaries were coming over for dinner at 5:00pm and I had piano lessons to teach from 3:00-5:00pm. Meanwhile, Reece had begun playing with her helium Valentine's Day balloon and was my happy, cheerful girl once again.

"Mom, look at this!" Reece said. She took her balloon and hit it against her head and then proceeded to laugh hysterically. This made me laugh, which prompted her to do it again. And she laughed hysterically. I got down on the floor and she hit me with the balloon, which made us both laugh. Can I just say that there is nothing better than laughing with your kids? 

Best. Feeling. Ever.

I gave her a kiss on her head and continued to get dinner ready. A second later I heard a loud pop. I turned to see Reece holding the limp shell of a helium balloon with a look of horror and shock on her face. Her mouth turned in to a frown and I knelt down and gave her a hug. She started to cry and asked me what happened to her balloon. It's amazing how the things that break their hearts, as simple as they may be, break yours as well.

I feebly explained that her balloon popped, and that once a balloon has popped, it can't be fixed. She spent the next couple of minutes begging me to fix her balloon. I got her calmed down and then moved on to making the filling for the lemon bars. 

Just a minute later Reece started to cry over her balloon. Again. I hate to admit that I was getting tired and losing my patience. But then from my sweet, blue-eyed, teary-voiced little girl came the words, "Mommy, will you please hold me?" My mind instantly thought about how quickly she's growing, and how I don't know how much longer she will actually want me to hold her. I put down the whisk and scooped her up. Tears blurred my vision as hers dampened my shirt. I just stood there and held her. 

That was my moment to realize that I need to take every opportunity to hold that sweet girl. To give her a hug. To sit and giggle with her over something as silly as a balloon. To kiss her cheek. In fact, tonight as I was tucking her in, I kissed her cheek and then kissed her forehead. 

She said, "Mommy, you already kissed me!" 

"Well, I wanted to kiss you twice!" I said.

"But why?"

"Because I love you! Goodnight Reecie."

"I love you too, Mommy."

Guys, my heart melted. I came downstairs and snuggled little miss MJ in the rocking chair for a few minutes. I am determined to soak up every minute and every ounce of them while they are still little, and while they still say, "Mommy, will you please hold me?"

Our First Few Weeks with Marley Jeene

On Friday, December 11th at 1:45pm, Marley Jeene Morgan made her entrance into this world. She weighed 6 pounds 13 ounces and was 20 inches long. Marley has added more love to our family than I thought possible in the short 17 days that she has been with us so far.

I look like a zombie in this picture
because it was taken at 11:30pm the night before
Marley was born. I was 41 weeks and 2 days
pregnant and completely exhausted. But, for the
sake of remembering, I included
this awful super flattering picture.

I'm going to write out my experience at the hospital simply so that I have it written somewhere. If you don't like reading this kind of stuff, simply skip the next three paragraphs.

I was due December 2nd. My due date came and went with nothing to get excited about. I went to an appointment the next day only to find out I wasn't dilated any further than I was the week before. At my appointment a week later I was dilated a little more, but not much. Being already eight days late my doctor wanted to induce me. I was set to receive a phone call from the hospital the next day as early as 4:00am telling me to come in. That night I made sure my phone's volume was all the way up and set to an incredibly obnoxious ringtone (I am a really heavy sleeper). I woke up at 4:30am to the most awful sound, fumbled around for my phone, and answered it. It was the hospital and they wanted me there at 6:00am! I was so excited. After a shower and some breakfast, Derek and I headed to the hospital. My mom was going to meet us there a little later, and my dad was all set to drop Reece off with my sister-in-law.

We checked into the hospital at 6:15am and they started me on pitocin at 7:30am. The anesthesiologist at the hospital was scheduled to be in a C-section at 9:00am, so my doctor called and said that I could wait until the anesthesiologist was done with the surgery, but by then I might have progressed too far to get an epidural. So we decided to get it before he went into surgery. Getting the epidural was painless and easy, however it only worked on one side. My right leg was completely numb. I couldn't even lift it off the bed, yet my left leg felt completely normal. I still wasn't feeling any painful contractions, but they were about 3-6 minutes apart and I was dilated to a 6. My doctor got to the hospital and broke my water at 12:20pm. At that point I was dilated to an 8, and still not feeling painful contractions. But once they broke my water, the contractions came on strong.

By 1:00pm I was feeling full labor contractions all on my left side, while my right side was still totally numb. Marley's heart rate was dropping with each contraction and taking longer to recover than they like to see, which made my nurse wonder if the cord had wrapped around Marley's neck when the water broke. My doctor came back at 1:30pm (she had been in surgery for the last hour) to check on me. I was fully dilated, but Marley was still up really high. She hung around, watched Marley's charts, and told me to let her know if I felt the need to push. Five minutes and a few more contractions later, and I felt like I wanted to push. A few minutes later my doctor was gowned and had everything she needed to deliver the baby. After just a few short minutes (they didn't feel very short to me at the time) Marley was born! She had the cord wrapped around her body and neck. The nurses laid her on my chest immediately  and started checking her vitals. Because the cord had been wrapped around her neck her heart was having a hard time recovering. So they took her to a little table in my room to monitor her until her heart recovered. Derek stood next to her the entire time holding her hand. I loved that their first priority was getting Marley skin-to-skin and that when they needed to keep a closer eye on her they kept her in my room where I could see her. I was in complete relief once she was born. And when they laid Marley on my chest I was just in awe at how beautiful and perfect she was.

Me and Marley just seconds after she was born.

That night we had so many family members come visit us, it was wonderful! I loved getting to see them all and I love that they all got to meet Marley when she was less than a day old. Family is such an amazing blessing, and I count myself even more blessed to have most of our family members so close!

The bili-bed model Marley was on.

The next day we found out that Marley had jaundice, like Reece. We left the hospital that evening with Marley's bilirubin levels at a 9. The next morning when we took her to the lab to get her levels checked again she had jumped up to a 14.4. A company that provides in-home phototherapy for infants came to the house that night and brought a bili-bed for Marley to use. Essentially, it's a platform with a clear top that has ultraviolet lights that shine on the baby as they lay on it. There is a blanket that covers the top of the platform that has a sleeper sewn onto it, however the back of the sleeper is mesh so that the lights can shine through and be on her skin. Marley was on the lights from Sunday evening until Friday morning. It was a challenge for me because she was only supposed to be off of the lights when she needed to be fed, and they wanted her to be off the lights for no more than 30-45 minutes at a time. We couldn't just hold her and snuggle her any time we wanted. I felt like I was being robbed of the sweetness of the newborn stage. I was pretty negative the entire time Marley was on the lights, just waiting and waiting for her bilirubin levels to go low enough so she could be done with phototherapy. However, I realize how blessed we were to have her be treated in our home instead of at the hospital, that her bilirubin levels never got dangerously high, and that she handled being on the bed so well. She hardly ever fussed at us when she was strapped in there.

Once she was able to come off the lights I felt like I got to live the normal life of a mom with a newborn. It was so nice to be able to sit and snuggle with her for as long as I wanted! Marley hardly spent more than a few minutes in her swing or bouncer seat before Derek, Reece, or my parents went over to hold her. She has been spoiled with so much love!

  

We had settled on the name Marley a while before she was born, but we didn't settle on a middle name until just a few weeks before. We kept it a secret because we knew that we wanted to be able to tell our moms first once Marley was born. Marley's middle name is Jeene. Jeene is a combination of my mom's name (Jerri) and my mother-in-law's name (Dorene). You take the first two letters of Jerri and the last three letters of Dorene and you get Jeene! It was maybe an hour after Marley was born, and it was me, Derek, my mom, and my mother-in-law in the hospital room. We told them Marley's middle name and they both looked happy. But when we explained why we chose the name we did, they both got tears in their eyes. It was a really sweet moment. We love that this little girl is named after both of her terrific grandmas!

Marley is the sweetest little thing, and I can't imagine life without her! I love seeing Reece as a big sister. If Marley starts making any kind of noise, Reece rushes over, pats her cheek and says, "It's okay Marley, your big sisters here. She's right here." It melts my heart.

These two little beauties are my whole world. I love being their mom. It has been interesting adjusting to the demands of a three year old and a newborn, but I think we've found our rhythm. We love our Miss Marley!

Making Life More Joyful

This past month my Facebook feed has been flooded with statuses of gratitude. Some people find this annoying and complain that we should be thankful all year long. Similar to how some people find Valentine's Day a silly holiday because we should show love, affection, and appreciation to those we love every day of the year. While I agree with being thankful and showing love every day, I also think that these holidays simply serve as reminders for us. They help us to remember to show love. They help us to remember to be grateful. How many of us have a spotless record when it comes to remembering everything that needs done? I can tell you with absolute certainty that I do not. Remembering things is actually something I have a really difficult time with. Just ask Derek how many loads of laundry have been forgotten in the dryer. It's pretty bad.

As I was driving home from the store this morning I glanced down at the external temperature reading on the dash. It read 30 degrees. Yet that didn't bother me one bit because I was inside my car, with my seat warmer turned on, and the climate control set to a perfectly comfortable temperature. I didn't have to walk home in the cold because I'm fortunate to have a dependable car. I had a smile on my face because I have been blessed with a funny, smart, and sweet little girl who loves to sing and says the funniest things. And it made me think of all the statuses I've been seeing this month, which reminded me of all the things I have to be grateful for. My car, my daughter, my husband (who fixes said car when there's something wrong), and employment (which allowed me to go to the store and get what we need for our family). My list could go on and on, and tonight I plan on making my entry in my journal full of the things I am so grateful for. But in that moment, driving home from the store, I felt incredibly happy. I felt fun, light, and joyful.

"There is one thing we can do to make life sweeter, more joyful, even glorious. We can be grateful!" 

-President Dieter F. Uchtdorf 

We can live every day with gratitude in our hearts. It is this Thanksgiving season that has helped remind me, once again, that being grateful is one of the greatest things we can do. Our lives can truly be joyful, even though we once again forgot about the load of colors that are sitting in the dryer waiting to be folded. And we can make our lives sweeter, more joyful, and even glorious by remembering (or at least doing our best to remember) to be grateful every day.

As this Thanksgiving season ends and we come into the Christmas season, it reminds me of how grateful I am for my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I give thanks to Him and to God for all of the blessings in my life. 

"That ye contend no more against the Holy Ghost, but that ye receive it, and take upon you the name of Christ; that ye humble yourselves even to the dust, and worship God, in whatsoever place ye may be in, in spirit and in truth; and that ye live in thanksgiving daily, for the many mercies and blessings which he doth bestow upon you."
Alma 34:38

11 And it came to pass, as he went to Jerusalem, that he passed through the midst of Samaria and Galilee.

12 And as he entered into a certain village, there met him ten men that were lepers, which stood afar off:

13 And they lifted up their voices, and said, Jesus, Master, have mercy on us.

14 And when he saw them, he said unto them, Go shew yourselves unto the priests. And it came to pass, that, as they went, they were cleansed.

15 And one of them, when he saw that he was healed, turned back, and with a loud voice glorified God,

16 And fell down on his face at his feet, giving him thanks: and he was a Samaritan.

17 And Jesus answering said, Were there not ten cleansed? but where are the nine?

18 There are not found that returned to give glory to God, save this stranger.

19 And he said unto him, Arise, go thy way: thy faith hath made thee whole.

Luke 17:11-19