It's All About Love. . . and Learning Not to be Selfish

I was having a conversation with my mom earlier this afternoon along the lines of learning how to share. Yes, I do realize that most kids understand the importance of sharing by the age of three. And I am just about twenty years past that. But this kind of sharing is something you don't realize you have to do until you get older.

Ever since Courtney got married (she was the first in our family to tie the knot), my mom has talked about how hard it is to share her kids. She tells us about the adjustment she had to make from having her baby be hers, to having her baby grow up and place their whole trust, devotion, and loyalty in another person. And then they're connected with and a part of another family. I laughed and said, "I kind of know what you mean!" No, I don't have children who are married. Reece is only three and a half months old, so Derek and I have a while until we get to that point. But I related to my mom's experience in another way through my nieces and nephews.

I love my nieces and nephews. So much. The strength of the love that I feel for each and every one of them surprised me when I first realized it. It's pretty awesome. But as time goes on, I have had to realize that I am not their only aunt. That my siblings and their spouses are not their only aunts and uncles. They have another family of aunts and uncles that love them just as much. And as those aunts and uncles get married, those spouses are now my sweet little nieces and nephews aunts/uncles as well. My first reaction is to want to shout at them,
"No! You can't have that relationship with them! They're mine!"

However, I'm not three years old. I know how to share. I just didn't ever imagine it would be harder than deciding to give up my favorite jungle animal figurine in preschool. It was the lion, by the way.

I mean, come on. Who wouldn't love this face?!

Then my mom said something incredibly insightful. She's an intelligent, amazing, and stupendous mother. She said, "But I had to realize, if I can love those other people just as much as I love my own kids, I can share my babies and grand-babies with them."

Then I realized something that may seem silly to everyone else. Life is all about learning to love.

Growing up, we have to learn how to love our siblings. Even when they pull our hair, call us names, and take our stuff. Then, we enter the dating world and we start to learn about a different love. Then, you get married. You learn to how to love someone unconditionally. You see their best and their worst; their strengths and their weaknesses, and yet you still love them more than you've loved anyone before. And then, you have children. These beautiful, perfect little babies are given to you, and from the moment you hold them in your arms you love them; it would be impossible not to. Your heart expands and grows with all of the love that you have for your sweet baby. And then, I imagine, more children come and the amount of love that you are capable of just continues to grow and grow.

All of our experiences here in this life are helping us learn how to love in different ways, on different levels, and with all our hearts.

The Savior tells us in the scriptures of the importance of learning to love. In Matthew 22:36-39 it says:

36  Master, which is the great commandment in the law?
37  Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind.
38  This is the first and great commandment.
39  And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.

In Moroni 7:45 it says:

45  And charity suffereth long, and is kind, and envieth not, and is not puffed up, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil, and rejoiceth not in iniquity but rejoiceth in the truth, beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.

We are here to learn. We are going to be tested and tried throughout our entire lives. Our patience will be pushed, our faith may sometimes falter, and the challenges of the every day grind are going to get to us once in a while. But, in my opinion, if we can focus on loving the Lord and loving those around us with everything we have, then life will seem a little simpler; our burdens won't feel so heavy, and it will be easier to see the rainbow before the clouds clear.

So, even though I love my nieces and nephews and want them all to myself, I have to share. I have to learn not to be selfish. My mom tells me that it will only get harder once it's my own children who are getting married and I have to learn how to share them. I don't even want to think about that right now. I mean, shoot; I'm still worked up over sharing the lion during play time at preschool.

Reece: 3 Months

Well, Derek and I have a 3 month old on our hands. And she couldn't be a better baby. Reece is just perfect! This is pretty much what her life consists of:

-Talking. Non-stop.

-Sleeping through the night. We're talking at least 8-9 hours a night. If not 11. It's beautiful.

-Smiling all the time. She loves me and Derek, knows our faces, and will almost always greet us with a big ol' grin.

-Sucking on her hands. This girl must have the best tasting hands ever, because we always find her with her hand in her mouth.

-Getting endless love and attention from her grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins that live here. She is a big hit.

-Reece has started to show more interest in her toys. She got a play gym for Christmas from my mom and dad, and she loves to lay underneath it and stare at those toys. She's even starting to show signs of reaching for them!

She has such a cute little personality, and it's getting stronger every day. She thinks her farts, burps, and sneezes are funny. She loves to have her little legs scrunched up on her tummy. It makes her grunt and then smile. Her feet are ticklish, and she'll stick out her tongue if you tickle her foot just right.

I love my baby girl. She is who I spend most of my day with, and I wouldn't have it any other way. All of my thoughts are about her, and when I make a decision, I consider how it affects her first. I expected to feel overwhelmed by all of the changes I felt becoming a mom, such as how much I love her. But, I never felt an overcoming wave of emotion. It was so natural. The transition from being just me to being Reece's mom and loving her unconditionally was seamless. I love my little Reecie baby.

2012 is Gone... Here's to 2013!

This year has brought a lot of new and wonderful things to our family! On Superbowl Sunday we found out we were going to have a baby, and we sat in stunned silence. Both of our families were so excited when we shared the exciting news that we were having a girl! Then, on October 5th at 6:42pm, Reece Averie was born. She was (and still is) absolutely perfect. Weighing in at only 6 pounds 14 ounces and measuring at just 19.5 inches long, she was a small one at birth. Reece is the best thing that has ever happened to me and Derek. She is the happiest, smiliest baby. Ever. Her smiles and sweet little "coos" and "goos" melt our hearts and turn us into those parents who just sit and smile at their child. We can't help ourselves! We just love her!

Derek and I have been married for two years now (woo!) and we are currently living in Washington with my parents. Derek has an internship during our off-semester, and then we will head back to Rexburg in April! With just two semesters left for each of us, we cannot wait to graduate and be official BYU-I Alumni. After that, we aren't quite sure what life will bring to us, but we are certainly looking forward to the adventures that 2013 has in store for us!

Looking back over this past year, we are so grateful for our families and friends. For the love, support, and laughs that we have shared with you. We are grateful for the gospel of Jesus Christ and for the beautiful blessings of the temple that make it possible for families to be eternal. We are grateful for a loving and trusting Heavenly Father who gave one of His precious spirits to us to watch over and love. She is our sweet Reece, and she definitely made our 2012.